Tuesday, November 14, 2006

The Whole Package.....a personal testimony

I was talking with the Lord yesterday, about "stuff" and He reminded me of the things that He started in me a little over a year ago. Things that He has shown me, done in me, changed in me over this past year or so. I felt really impressed to share this testimony with other singles. While it opens me up and makes me very vulnerable on things you like to keep very private, I know that the Lord wanted me to share it so it could help others that are currently in the same place that I was last year at this time.

I had just finished watching the movie "The Kid" by Disney with Bruce Willis. It was the second time the Lord had used that movie to do some major deliverance in me. I went upstairs to my loft and sat down and just started talking to the Lord about the second half of the movie and what I had just seen. I have always wanted to be married, learned so much about it from the Word of God, books, teachers, couples etc, thought I knew something and then that night, what the Lord revealed to me totally shocked me. As I prayed and talked with Him He told me that I had been "afraid" of marriage. Well that surprised me, but as I sat there, with this newfound knowledge, and allowed God to show me things, He unfolded what had been going on in my life for many years. Way in the back of my mind, not even concious of it, I began to see that I had been looking for and waiting for and beliving for a "perfect marriage". You know, you see other couples having problems, not being nice to one another, just everyday normal stuff and you think "that is not going to happen to me and my husband! It will be different for us because we are Christians (followers of Christ)." You know those thoughts that most singles have that things will be just perfect, God will bring our mate to us, we won't even have to work for it, and then we will float off in to la-la land on love and never have a cross word or any problems! Yep, that was me, but I had not realized it until that night. God told me that I had not been willing to accept "the whole package". I was looking for perfect up until that point. He said that everyone comes to a marriage with baggage, scars, flaws, hurts-all of us; and we have to be willing to accept the Whole Package. The mate for each of us includes all of those things. We will never have a marriage or the mate He has intended for us until we are willing to accept all that comes with that.....everyday life! I have listened to many singles talking for the past several months, and I do hear these undertones. I was there....I know.

What God did for me that night was deliver me from that "perfection mode" for marriage and a mate. I repented and asked God to forgive me for not being willing to accept the whole package prior to that. I asked Him to forgive me for running and being afraid of the very thing that I wanted the most....to share my life with the man God intended for me and me for him. I asked God to forgive me for not being willing to come outside of the little box I had built for myself......small, comfortable (or so I thought), easy. I mean afterall, to look outside of the box, the norm (or the worlds definition of norm) was just too much work, it was hard to be shaped and molded into something new; but praise God He did that in me. From that day forward (late September 2005) I allowed Him to do a new thing in me. He brought me so far out of the box, you would not believe. I began to see relationships, marriages, from a new perspective, from a "real" perspective and God brought me to the place that I was very willing to "accept the whole package". You see, "the package" may not look like we think it should look like, may not sound like we think it should sound, may not come wrapped the way we think it should come......and that is how we can miss out on what God is doing. There is a lot of truth in the saying "never judge a book by it's cover." So whether you are a guy or a girl, waiting for "the one", just remember to allow God to take you outside of the box, and do in you what He wants to do, so that you are willing to accept "the whole package." Remember, you are a package too, and when you get married, the person you marry has to be willing to accept you and all of your flaws, and scars and pain and baggage......and God knows how to make that happen. TRUST HIM. Let go of the control singles.........let God bring you outside of the box you have created for yourself and show you a whole new world, a whole new outlook, a fresh anointing! You will be so glad you did.

One last note, not long after this night of deliverance and revelation for me, God gave me a vision right before I woke up. It was about "becoming" together. He used a Pampered Chef recipe that I do a lot, and showed the ingredients being put into the bowl one at a time. The bowl that held the ingredients was God, the foundation or base ingredient in the recipe was the Word, Jesus. The next ingredient that was added was the man, then the next was the woman, then the sauce and the garlic for "spice and flavor". Then the whole thing was mixed together, blended together, and put into the crust and placed in the oven. It "became" the finished product, a sweet smelling savor. But none of those ingredients would have been good alone. Italian sausage is great, but not by itself. Bell Pepper and Onions are great, but not by themselves. Garlic and sauce are great, but not by themselves. It took putting all of the ingredients, the husband, the wife, and all that went into the marriage - the spices the flavor, the "whole package" to make the finished product! And they "became" together. When two people come together as husband and wife, it is a start of a new journey, a new process and they "become" together. That is what the Lord showed me that morning. Be blessed my friends, I truly want Gods very best for every one of you. I love you all...........


Tim_Steph said...

Amen! Could it be that the "baggage" of one fits the "unbaggage" of the other to bring each to a wholeness not found apart?

TAB said...

Wow, you said a mouthfull, but that is so true....so true.....I never thought of it that way before! That is what I get for asking the Lord to "teach me" each day! Thank you Jesus!