Thoughts.................

Some thoughts I have wanted to share with you all. Many of us have been talking about these things for a while. As singles they are on our minds and heart so I thought I would give voice to those thoughts and pulled from a few resources to share……………..

"Has God abandoned us? Did we not pray enough? Is this just something we accept as “part of life,” suck it up, even though it breaks our hearts? After a while, the accumulation of event after event that we do not like and do not understand erodes our confidence that we are part of something grand and good, and reduces us to a survivalist mind-set. I know, I know—we’ve been told that we matter to God. And part of us partly believes it. But life has a way of chipping away at that conviction, undermining our settled belief that he means us well. I mean, if that’s true, then why didn’t he _______? Fill in the blank. Heal your mom. Save your marriage. Get you married. Help you out more. Bring the finances.

Either (a) we’re blowing it, or (b) God is holding out on us. Or some combination of both, which is where most people land. Think about it. Isn’t this where you land, with all the things that haven’t gone the way you’d hoped and wanted?"
Waking the Dead (John Eldredge)

1 Corinthians 13:11 “When I was a child, I spoke and thought and reasoned as a child. But when I grew up, I put away childish things.”

Captivating, Wild at Heart (taking part in a great adventure and Relationships and Marriage are just that-A Great Adventure); and Song of Solomon. My roommates and I are watching the 12 part series by Tommy Nelson (which I have not seen in several years) on Song of Solomon. It is a great series and I have never heard anyone teach on it, especially not like Tommy Nelson who takes you verse by verse through the entire 8 chapters of this book. Snow Patrol has a song that says “It's not as easy as willing it all to be right , Got to be more than hoping it's right I want to hear you laugh like you really mean it, collapse into me tired with joy.” Did God just take something as complicated as Love, Relationships, Marriage, and just put us here and say “Hey, I know it’s not easy, but figure it out and hope that is works!” I don’t think so, because it is not easy, He gave us His blueprint for this very thing “Song of Solomon”. I am no expert, but I can share with you what God has to say about it in His word and let you walk it through in your own lives. In this amazing book, which the church has shied away from, because of it’s explicit content, God teaches us how He intended it to be between Men and Women from the Attraction, to Dating to Courting to Romance to Marriage and Sex (yep, it’s in there) to Confrontation/Fighting Fair, to Making Up to Life Long Commitment. It sheds light on this Mystery called Love and Marriage.

“The spiritual life cannot be made suburban,” said Howard Macey. “It is always frontier and we who live in it must accept and even rejoice that it remains untamed.” The greatest obstacle to realizing our dreams is the false self’s hatred of mystery. That’s a problem, you see, because mystery is essential to adventure. More than that, mystery is the heart of the universe and the God who made it. The most important aspects of any man’s world— his relationship with his God and with the people in his life, his calling, the spiritual battles he’ll face—every one of them is fraught with mystery. But that is not a bad thing; it is a joyful, rich part of reality and essential to our soul’s thirst for adventure.”
Wild at Heart (John Eldredge)

It’s important to lay some foundational things. There is more to relationships than just being attracted to one another, exploding with desire for one another (which burns out quickly if that is all it is based on). You want to be best friends with the person you will marry. You want to be able to talk and share about everything, and want to share your life and all the experiences that go with that. Sex is a great part of marriage, but if you don’t have the best friendship, the dreaming and working to achieve together, with God as your center (think of the triangle) then it won’t last the test and trials that life will bring.

Think about that. As John Bevere said at Desperation Conference in Colorado: “You want the relationship (mate) that will propel you to your destiny, not hinder you from it.” When two people decide that they want to get married, part of that has to be “What is God calling us to do together, what does He need us to accomplish for Him that we can not do by ourselves (alone).” All things are for His purposes, and He gives us “all things to enjoy.” There is always a greater reason for two people coming together in marriage than just being attracted or just making love (sex) or just having children, and all of those things are great…..don’t get me wrong. But as I heard it said many years ago, as the Kingdom of God goes, there is little that is more powerful than a husband and wife in one mind, one accord. They can change a whole city because a husband and wife can be one like no other two people can be. The enemy knows this, which is why he has fought marriages, Christian marriages so hard. You have to go into the Marriage/Relationship with the mind set “Divorce is not an option!” Take a stand against the enemy together, and watch your home, your family, your city change because of it! True, if it were easy, everyone would do it, and stick with it, but it is about Jesus, and the Word of God says “I can do all things through Christ (the anointed one and His anointing) that strengthens me.”

Song of Solomon shows us the blueprint of how to do this, for a lifetime and bring Glory to God at the same time. He shows us in this book the art of Attraction, and still glorify God, Courting and still Glorify God, Marriage, the wedding night (sex) and yes, bringing God Glory at the same time, Romance and still giving God the Glory, Fighting Fair and Resolving differences while giving God the Glory, and Romance and Companionship for a lifetime while giving God the Glory.

“You are Mine, You are Mine, You are Mine all mine, You are mine.” (Mute Math)

Love is Chosen: “Any parent or lover knows this: love is chosen. You cannot, in the end, force anyone to love you.

So if you are writing a story where love is the meaning, where love is the highest and best of all, where love is the point, then you have to allow each person a choice. You have to allow freedom. You cannot force love. God gives us the dignity of freedom, to choose for or against Him (and friends, to ignore Him is to choose against Him).

This is the reason for what C.S. Lewis called the Problem of Pain. Why would a kind and loving God create a world where evil is possible? Doesn’t he care about our happiness? Isn’t he good? Indeed, he does and he is. He cares so much for our happiness that he endows us with the capacity to love and to be loved, which is the greatest happiness of all.
He endows us with a dignity that is almost unimaginable. For this creator God is no puppeteer. “
Epic (John Eldredge)

“I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance
Never settle for the path of least resistance
Livin' might mean takin' chances, but they're worth takin'
Lovin' might be a mistake, but it's worth makin'
Don't let some hell-bent heart leave you bitter
When you come close to sellin' out, reconsider
Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance
And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance
I hope you dance, I hope you dance” Lee Ann Womack

“I hope all my days will be lit by your face
I hope all the years will hold tight our promises
I don't want to be old and sleep alone
An empty house is not a home
I don't want to be old and feel afraid” Keane

You all are welcome to come and watch the “Song of Solomon” series with us. It will truly be an eye opening experience and you will be blessed! All you singles out there, feel free to comment! I love you all…….